Alistair McGowan: Introductions to Classical Piano, Royal Albert Hall, review: fewer arpeggios and more punchlines please

It’s never too late to learn. Alistair McGowan was 49 when he took up the piano in earnest, just over four years ago. Two years later he had a classical album in the charts, and now the TV impressionist is playing the Albert Hall (actually a little room next to the hall, but close enough). Not bad going for a man who has only just passed his grade five theory exam. His music teacher, a guest at Wednesday’s show, is doubtless very proud. But are the rest of us just humouring him?

Introductions to Classical Piano begins with McGowan’s attempt to pre-empt criticism. A two-hour concert of Bach, Chopin et al with celebrity impressions in between, he says, is an idea that simply “doesn’t work.” As he explains in the adenoidal tones of Harry Kane, “I don’t think people who like Tottenham Hotspur will also like Wedding Day at Troldhaugen.”

Plenty like both, of course. If there’s a problem here, it’s not the clash of classical music and comedy, but the lack of it. The highlight is the one moment when both meet: a rendition of Nocturne No 2 by his beloved Erik Satie, with McGowan reading Satie’s eccentric instructions aloud while he plays (Satie’s scores include directions like “with amazement” and “I want a solid mahogany hat”).

That aside, each piece is treated respectfully, with feeling if not quite flair, after a few trivia-filled comments on the composers’ lives. It’s a little like watching Eric Morecambe solemnly play all the right notes in the right order.

Comedians from Eric Hoffnung to Bill Bailey – and, recently, the brilliant young impressionist Kieran Hodgson – have created far more ambitious and ingenious introductions to classical music. But McGowan’s easygoing warmth and bonhomie make this a perfectly pleasant evening all the same.

Though over-egged dynamics drown Debussy’s La cathédrale engloutie, elsewhere the music is well chosen to make the most of his modest talents - polite, quiet pieces, played quietly and politely, yet with moments of real beauty. He teases the audience with a choice between Tchaikovsky and Rachmaninoff, before admitting he can’t play either.

He has the technical chops when it comes to impersonations, however, as fans of The Big Impression and Spitting Image will know. At one point he illustrates how - just by elongating a few vowels - he can slide from Rev Richard Coles to Robert Peston via Jacob Rees-Mogg in a single sentence.

The voices are spot-on, but there’s a by-the-numbers quality to the joke-writing that suggests he should have spent less time working on his arpeggios, and more on his punchlines. (On struggling with modern music: “I don’t know my house from my garage - which makes it very difficult to park my car.”)

McGowan mentions the new easy-listening classical station Scala Radio so often one suspects he’s angling for a job there. They would be wise to snap him up quickly: if nothing else, this show proves his love of classical music is sincere and infectious, and he makes a charming guide through it.

Alistair McGowan plays Norden Farm Centre, Maidenhead (01628 788997) tonight, and tours until July 14.