“I’ve read that couples are increasingly blending their surnames together,” Mollie boomed to someone who I think was called Producer Dave, or Radio Robbie (I wasn’t really listening), while we sat in traffic. “A message from the King: by Royal decree, we must blend,” I said to my fiancee, who is great not just because she a) was driving b) is marrying me and c) is obviously the best person I know, but because she has a nice, normal surname: Learoyd. As a surname, Fishwick has all the subtlety of a trombonist wearing a Hawaiian shirt.